What can you do today to better afford your nanny?

Bar the Fairgodmother walking over to hand over some cash, singing "Bibbideebobbadeeboo" - finding money in our daily budgets for a nanny is our Mum-derella problem.

It's the conversation of all conversations for any parent struggling to balance our budgets! If you're lucky enough to have secured an elusive spot in childcare centres, once you hit 2-3 children, it ends up being more affordable to have them cared for by a nanny. At the end of the day, we all know it needs to make financial sense for you to go to work and the affordability of your children's care is going to dictate this.

Research of 262 working women, commissioned by the online businesswomen's network group Sphinxx, found that children and careers fail to mix.

Key findings:

 48% of respondents said childcare costs had hit their career, but not their partners (71.6%)

 52% of respondents qualified for the rebate, but 92% still rate childcare costs as important or very important political/ election issue

 86% would give their vote to the party with a tax-deductible policy on childcare 48% say cost of childcare has impacted upon career to date

 62% say the cost of childcare has led to a reduction in their working hours

 74% say it’s difficult or very difficult to find available quality child care

Sobering stats, but realistic in many cases, isn't it?

Today, you can deduct tax for:

1. Training
2. iPads
3. Mobile phones
4. Work wear, even...

But, try to deduct childcare costs - the most important and substantial cost for any working parent trying to contribute to the workforce - and you're greeted by a "heck-to-the-no, girlfriend!" finger-snapping wall. 

Recent discussions in the news around Tony Abbott's Nanny Plan - expanding the childcare rebate to cover in-home care provided by nannies - are further fuelling the already-hot debate on how to make childcare options more accessible for the working parent.

While he's happily riding on a wave of female voter interest at the moment - this is all fairy-pie-in-the-sky conjecture until next year's election.

So, let's cut to the chase. What options do we have right now? A little digging around has surfaced a few morsels for consideration:

Approved Childcare for Childcare Benefit Payments

Nannies can register themselves with the Family Assistance Office to become registered carers so you can be eligible for the Childcare Benefit payments. He/She must just be over 18 years of age, an Australian resident (for tax purposes) and have a tax file number of their own.  

Nannies who meet the eligibility criteria need to take proof of their age and identity to their local Centrelink or Family Assistance Office to register for an individual child care provider status.

Once your nanny has registered he/she will be allocated a CRN (Childcare Registration Number), which must be used on all invoices to employers. Employers use these invoices/receipts for claiming Child Care Benefit or Rebate.

For more information - visit the FAO site: http://www.familyassist.gov.au/payments/family-assistance-payments/child-care-benefit/registered-care.php

Just remember though, that in reality - many nannies who do work part-time prefer cash in hand and might or might not want to be subject to income tax. But this is something you should discuss with them openly right at the beginning to gauge their position. It would certainly be more attractive for more full-time nannies with 4-5 day roles who would rely on your job as an income. 

Hiring a Nanny as an Employee to Claim Tax Deductions on Wages

If you run a business as an ABN holder, you could put your nanny on the staff in the business. The business claims the wages as a tax deduction. For larger companies, many out there pay the nanny's salary as a fringe benefit to company directors and senior staff, and the tax is avoided here also.  

Of course, with any staff hire, you'll need to ensure that you adhere to contractual agreements, income tax, superannuation, leave, sick/holiday pay and insurance guidelines as required of any responsible employer. 

If this option appeals to you, speak to your tax and HR advisors for further information. 

Until we land the motherlode of solutions - check out these options for yourself if the shoe fits. And by golly, I certainly hope you'll feel like Cinderella soon!

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What's Your Parenting Style?

 
What is it indeed?

I had a think about this myself. You see, our son is the quintessential rebel without a cause, but with a really gentle soul...deep down.  Mind you, he's also only 3.

So, this means meant that we've had our fair share of - "Maybe we'll try this, or that....Wait, this doesn't work, this works better!"

I think we're at the firm yet loving stage of our parenting - accompanied by sessions where we try to get him to verbalise his feelings and wants using words, vs. volume or force. 

What brought this about? Well, I read an article in the WSJ about the author of a new book called "Bringing Up Bebe: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting."  

Having her children in Paris, she discovered that the French offspring were astonishly well-behaved - not just one or two of them, but the majority of them. Imagine that!

On the other hand, we've all heard about the Tiger Mom - a new term for super-ambitious and strict mothers who believe the best of a child can be achieved through discipline and a strong work ethic. 

So many styles - so little time! What's a parent to do? 

Book Review Offer Time!

In the interest of anthropology and also to hear what you, as Australian parents, think about parenting styles - we've set up a giveaway draw for 2 parents to win a copy of "Bringing Up Bebe" and one parent to win a copy of "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother" in return for a book review on our Facebook page by the 7th of May, 2012.

I can't wait to hear what you think!

All you need to do to is pop by our Facebook page -www.facebook.com/meetasitter - and comment on what you think your parenting style is and how you came about it. We'll draw the winners by Tuesday April 17, 2012.' *Books will be delivered by the week after latest.

Come on then...They are mighty great reads!

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Tablets as Babysitters - Where Do You Stand? 

Checking my Google News Alerts as I do everyday, I read an interesting report by Nielsen recently about the role of tablets as babysitters. Bing! Now how do we go about recruiting? Kidding! 

According to the report released in February 2012, titled “American Families See Tablets as Playmate, Teacher and Babysitter,” 70% of children under the age of 12 years use the tablet. This is a 9% from just 3 months prior. 

You only have to take a flight to find at least a few parents with toddlers pacifying their child on a long-haul trip with an iPad or Samsung Galaxy. 

Hands up, who’s guilty as charged? Then again - should we really feel guilty? Is it really that bad? 

I remember the days when (here we go belying my age!) sneaking off with a volume from our Encyclopedia shelf was already considered naughty behaviour. Then is was the awful prospect of having to watch TV infront of our parents...or worse still, having to wait for a programme we liked. Now, with just $300, you can be a proud owner of a tablet - a personal smart device that your child can have all to themselves to do a million things with...whilst we chillax with a tea for a second.

According to the survey, 77% of the kids are downloading games, with 57% of them using it for educational purposes. A close third is 55% using them as entertainment while travelling. From there, it’s used for a mishmash of watching shows or movies, entertainment in restaurants and other events. By far, the smallest percentage of usage  comes for the purpose to “communicate with friends and family.”

We have two tablets in our household, and our 3 year old son uses them both. At first it was merely to keep him occupied at restaurants and on long-haul flights with educational apps and kids movies. Now, he also loves taking pictures with them and doing brain-teasing puzzle games. We do limit the time he spends on it and balance it with outdoor activities, books and good old fashioned crafts/art. But, I do admit, I felt guilty when we first started letting him use it. Was I being a bad parent? Shouldn’t he be in his bedroom reading books instead?

For us, we decided that this was the way the world was heading. Children today learn in different ways and will need to moving forward. There’s no denying this. So, being tech-geeks ourselves, it would be better that we introduce him to it but manage that process so he’s familiar with the technology that he’ll be using in his life ahead.  Also, we teach him that it’s a privilege, not a right to use it. So he understands that he always needs to ask permission to use it and he won’t always be able to unless we agree to a time and place. That may not be the decision you’d make for your child. There isn’t any right or wrong to this - just as in any parenting choice.

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For parents who have decided to take this step, many have their own rules the kids must abide by.

One mother says, “You have access to all their online accounts, have the admin password for downloading apps, and check their SMS and Internet history with random "daddy" checks. I have four kids, twelve apple and android devices - and zero problems, just because of those three rules.”

Of her 18 month old daughter, another admits, “My daughter loves my iPad (and smart phone) but I also limit its use to only 5 minutes at a time. At this age, I'd prefer if she didn't use any media but since I'm on my computer fairly often, she wants to copy mommy. So, a bit of ABC or e-books won't hurt.  I try to engage her with real-life activities as much as I put her in front of a media screen. Exposing children to media early is great so long as there’s a lot of parental guidance.”

Yet another says, “My 2 year old loves my tablet. I treat his time on it like other screen time (computer, tv), limited as I need to when I need to get chores done, get through check out line at grocery store, cook dinner or just need to regain my sanity. He’ll build a train, engage with book apps, as well as some flash card apps. I admit, he finds it hard to put it down, so I try hard to keep it out of sight and let him only use it when I need an electronic babysitter. I believe that kids learn from people, so while a tablet, tv or computer may have educational shows, games and apps, I personally don't consider his time on it as education.”

Other parents set a clear book of rules of engagement: “This is how we run the show with our tablet use for the children:

1. Its communal and shared. Lesson No.1: You must learn to share. Fail to do so and it goes away. Lesson

No.2: If it’s an educational game, your younger sibling can learn while watching you, so you can help him when it’s his turn.

2. You aren’t allowed to download anything from anywhere. That’s a parental right alone.

3. You must learn to try new things. You can't play the same thing again and ...and again. 

4.  Sometimes it goes away. It’s just not tablet time now and you have to accept that. 

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We should be careful not to lament the technology for its own sake - but proactively manage the risks involved with our children using the tablet. The first is around content - be mindful of what they’re exposed to and engaging with on it. Secondly, it’s around isolationism. Using it too much encourages the child to be more concerned about being by themselves vs. learning important skills like sharing, socialising, exercising etc.

Where do you stand? Have your say by leaving a comment below! We'd love to hear your perspective. 

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For a little light-heartedness - this is an adorable video that portends to how our children interact with media today: “A magazine is an iPad that does not work.”

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Exclusive Movie Ticket Giveaway - 5 Double Passes to "A Little Bit of Heaven"

Fans of Kate Hudson and Gael Garcia Bernal, here's your chance to take some "me" time out with your partner, friends or just yourself! 

We're thrilled to be able to give away 5 double movie passes to the movie, courtesy of Hoyts Distribution!  

It’s a comedy about a guarded woman who finds out she’s dying of cancer, but when she meets her match, the threat of falling in love is scarier than death.Marley Corbett (Kate Hudson) is young, beautiful, and wildly funny, but she’s afraid of opening herself up to true love and commitment. Though she uses her humor to prevent matters from getting serious, a life-changing visit to her doctor (Gael Garcia Bernal) sends both of them on an eye-opening adventure of mutual discovery, leading to revelations neither thought possible.

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To enter the giveaway (Draw on Friday 16 March):
1. Leave a comment gere on what your idea of a "little bit of heaven" is.

2. Share our facebook page - www.facebook.com/meetasitter - with your friends.

We'll draw the winners on Friday March 16, 2012.

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Storm Clouds Ahead - 8 Warning Signs To Look Out For With Your Nanny

So you’ve hired your nanny after an anxious journey to this wonderful point! Congratulations!

From this point, a different journey starts – will he/she do as good a job as you need them to? I’d say most of the time, parents end up doing a great job of following your instincts and finding the right person for your child and family. But, with your kids, it's wise to remain vigilante – so it’s savvy to know if you’ve picked the right carrot out of the bunch. 

What I wanted this article to be beyond a warning signpost, is to also highlight the difference between a normal teething issue vs. a real problem. So read on with perspective that we have a part to play in the relationship.

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Finding a nanny or a babysitter - whether it’s for the first time or your twentieth - can be fraught with questions. It’s a privilege to be able to help parents find the answers, because this is likely to be the most important employee you’ll ever hire. So you have every right to have questions, and every right to have the answers you need.

I’ve been trying to do just that whenever any one of you contacts me, so I thought it would be nice to have this newsletter dedicated to sharing a few commonly asked questions that might help more of you. Feel free to share this newsletter with your friends if you think they’d like to know too!

Parent: I'm currently employing one of the girls I met via your service and she' great! I'd like to employ her for a long weekend eg
Friday night through to Monday morning when she' drop children off at school daycare. I unfortunately can't afford to pay her by the hour for this
and am wondering what's a fair amount to pay, and how I best negotiate this with her.   

Meet A Sitter: Just because you managed to come home the night before, doesn't mean you want to be awake by 6am the next morning. If you're looking for help the morning after and some fun for the kids, why not get your sitter to stay overnight. Normally, you can expect to pay them their normal hourly rate for time spent caring for your kids and just add circa $40-60 for the overnight period.

Generally, my advice would be to assess the hourly rate and do a flat rate for the overnight segment plus any other expenses you'll need her to take care of with your kids - excursions, travel etc.

Because it's likely that it will be something attractive to her from a monetary perspective, she might be amenable to doing it for a little less than the total calculation if money is tight. Just read her signals and be frank and honest about what you can afford. If you have a good relationship and are honest with her, she'll likely be happy to help.

One last thing would be to be upfront about what you do expect her to do on top of the normal sitting she does - housekeeping elements, meal prep (best to freeze or pre-prep so she can focus on the kids and just reheat if possible) etc. 

More on the topic related to this on our blog: http://meetasitter.posterous.com/35524822

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Parent:

Great to meet you and we're talking through details with C to start with us in 2 weeks!

I had a question though on this front that I thought you might be able to provide some info on whether I should prepare a formal contract of employment or just rely on a more informal agreement?

I'm not sure whether we should be putting a formal contract in place with her or whether an email agreement on some key points covers things - can you advise on normal proceedings here?

Meet A Sitter:

Contract or informal agreement - There is no formula for this. Many parents go with a verbal agreement, but I believe it's better to have it down on paper/email mainly to ensure both parties are aware of what's expected - responsibilities, rates, etc. Often with a nanny, you'll also find that you might need to change your requirements - whether it's for emergencies or as your needs change. So having something too rigid in a contract format might prove limiting, unless you make "provisions" for these in the agreement. That said, something in terms of a termination/resignation clause might be good to include in your informal/formal agreement in terms of notice period and payout. This would be of advantage to both you and your nanny as this would have the greatest impact on both parties.

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Parent:

I’m just about to hire one of the nannies I met at the event - thank you! - and just want to check on whether I need to get any insurance. If there are any accidents either way on our property or while she is out and about with our daughter - what's the situation? Does she need to have any liability insurance or is there something specific that we need to consider taking out?

Meet A Sitter:

With regards to liability insurance, if you have that for your home, that should cover her on your property. To cover you in situations outside of that, the nanny can buy nanny insurance which would indemnify and cover her from liability as part of her job as a professional nanny. She would need to buy this and there aren't many providers but some do it for example www.nannysure.com.au.  If the price seems steep for her, you might agree to subsidise part of it if that was something you’d be open to.

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Parent:

I am really keen on hiring a babysitter but I’m not sure what kind of checks I can do to ensure they have a clean police record. Can you advise me on this please?

Meet A Sitter:

There are generally two kinds of background checks you would want a candidate to get:

a)    National Police Check - These checks are often referred to as police checks, national name checks or national police certificates. Once a police check has been requested for or by a volunteer or applicant, their name will usually be checked against all criminal records in Australia. A key element to note here is that some, usually less serious, offences will no longer appear on police checks after a number of years (this is ten years in most jurisdictions).

b)    Working with Children Check - This check is more extensive and targeted than the National Police Check. Unlike police checks which screen for all unspent convictions, working with children checks look specifically for relevant offences that impact their suitability to work with children and draw from various sources. These generally include, but are not limited to, crimes of a violent or sexual nature against children. In addition to checking criminal records, working with children checks may include checks against sex offender registers and adverse findings on professional disciplinary registers held by professional organisations, for example, teachers, nurses, child care workers, health practitioners, foster carers, etc.

More information on the difference between the two can be found on our blog: http://meetasitter.posterous.com/the-difference-between-working-with-children

For further information about Meet A Sitter and how we can help you find a babysitter or nanny through our boutique service, visit: http://www.meetasitter.com.au 

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Looking for help for the holidays or a start in Jan/Feb? When should you start looking?

What better time than now to write a little something about the best time to start looking for a candidate. Here are a few considerations to take note of during your search: 

1. Timing - When's early enough but not too early? It's a fine line - most of you obviously want to get your nanny/afterschool carer locked in for the start of next year - but when should you start looking? There isn't a formulaic time - but I would advise that you start no earlier than late October/early November and no later than early December for someone to start in January the next year. Why? Let the sleighbells ring and the auld lang syne tune in! It's the silly and festive season soon and many will be away back home for the holidays or planning on going away. So, this might be the sweet spot for securing someone early enough to lock it in for next year. The candidates would also love to know they have a job to start with before they leave on holidays.
2. University students - They generally commence between mid/end November to mid/end February the following year. So, many would be looking to get work over the holiday period (great for holiday help when the kids are off from school/daycare). Unfortunately, most don't receive their university schedules for the next year until February, so you might find a perfect person but won't know for sure if they are going to be able to help you until the next year! Nerve-wracking indeed! Probably a good idea to hedge your bets and meet a group of candidates before the year's end so you can spread your chances of finding someone if a student fits your preferred profile.
3. Professional nannies may also face diminishing hours from families whose children are going to start school or daycare the following year. In this circumstance, many end up looking for new families to either fill their hours or start afresh completely. So, it's a perfect time to start tapping into this scarce resource as you'll be sure, they'll be out looking! If this was your "rice-bowl" career (sorry, I cannot avoid the chinese bend in me!) - you'd be looking too. 
4. Contingencies - Surprise! We don't live in a perfect world (drats!). You may find someone perfect for you in November, but come January - they might have found a better offer or longer hours from another family. So, always make sure you check up with your candidate every 3-4 weeks during the holiday period to make sure nothing has changed. Until they start with you - anything can happen! Crazy...but true! It's better that you're realistic about it than caught with your pants down when it counts. So - my advice would be to keep in touch with them and be open to having a backup (or two) in your pocket. They might not have the perfect schedule - but they could tide you over until you find another perfect fit if you're caught in a bind at the last minute. 

So there's my two cents worth of advice just before the frenzy begins! Reading between the many lines above: a) Know when to start your search, (b) Understand the motivations of your candidate profile, (c) Make sure you have a contingency plan and backup options. 

Hopefully you'll crack this nut and be whizzing through your holidays without a care in the world....except how much sugar your kids might be ingesting. Oh let the countdown begin. ;)

For further information about Meet A Sitter and how we can help you find a babysitter or nanny through our boutique service, visit: http://www.meetasitter.com.au 

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A Nanny’s Perspective - 5 Steps to Making Your Relationship Work

I know – you may be thinking, we’ve read all this before. And sure, there’ve been articles galore about hiring and managing the relationship you’re your nanny. Heck, I’ve written a few of them myself! But, it’s always been from the perspective of the parent. If we’re really keen on making things work mutually – wouldn’t you like to know the nanny’s perspective?

I hope that’s what we’ve done here. Sharon – a wonderful career nanny who’s been caring for children (including three of her own) for a few decades – graciously agreed to share her point of view in the article below.

Here’s a nanny’s perspective on how to make the relationship work to complement that. Enjoy the read and give us some feedback!

In the grand scheme of things, hiring a nanny is probably the most important hire you’ll ever make. We put so much effort in HR policies and nurturing relationships with employees at work – wouldn’t you like to make sure you’re doing the best you can for the employee who means the most to your family?

Here are some things I’d recommend parents consider in the process of hiring and managing the relationship with your nanny:

Find the right person and cherish them.

When going through your search process, think carefully about the qualities and skillset most important to you.  Some nannies are career-qualified professionals and others are seeking a part-time job outside of their day job or study commitments.  Both could be the right person for you - it all depends on whether you have a good fit or not.  Once the choice has been made, your nanny needs to feel appreciated and respected in the relationship. It can be as simple as asking for an opinion on how they’d handle a certain situation vs. laying down the law on all and sundry. A happy nanny equals a happy child.

     Trust that you have chosen well.

Having someone in your home can feel pretty uncomfortable at first.  Let’s face it, there are all sorts of personal and precious things that you may feel vulnerable about, and it’s not only your beautiful children. You should try to focus on the bigger picture. If you have a nanny with the right experience and certification, and they are someone that you have a good feeling about, then relax and trust that all will be well. Leaving someone in your home then worrying about it creates negative energy that is transferred , it will affect everyone − including your little ones.

     Communication is key to working as a team.

As busy as life gets, a daily discussion should be slotted into your day for a variety of reasons - most important of which is to get to know one another as individuals. When you take the time to connect on a deeper level, lots of positive things can happen. First, the nanny will start to see you as a person not just as a paycheck.  You, on the other hand, may begin to value her abilities. This opens up our hearts and minds to working together as a team towards the same goal – raising your child as best you can. Your nanny comes to appreciate your parenting style and begin adapting that into her own, and vice versa.  The openness also enables you both to start having frank and honest discussions about things that might impact your child or your working relationship. An easy way to do this is with a daily communication book with notes from mum or dad on baby’s mood, food and activities, continued during the day by nanny on the same topics, keeps everyone up to speed.

     Try not to your nanny into a cleaner.

I know it’s tempting to get things done at home; there is always something to do and the list never ends. Assuming that your nanny can start doing the cleaning as well as caring for your child may be presumptuous and counter-productive.  Certainly, in the beginning you are entitled to request the things that you want done and it’s up to the nanny to let you know if she feels comfortable performing those tasks.  If she doesn’t, then you may not have a fit or may just need to find a cleaner who can do it in a focused way. Taking care of your child is always the first priority for your nanny. And, if you create a relationship with her, she will want to help you whenever you can – whether you’ve asked her to or not.

      When things go wrong

Sometimes, life gets in the way of smooth sailing - accidents happen, things get turned upside down and people get upset. What’s important is how we deal with each other so that there is an avenue to move forward. Even parents have accidents or make mistakes, so trying not to blame or judge is a good start.

The issue may also be one of trust. Should that be the case, then that might be a deal breaker. It’s important to put yourself in your nanny’s shoes and ask yourself if this can be resolved with more communication and understanding to get to root of things amicably.

If your nanny feels as though they are being attacked − even subtly - it’s rarely a point to start successful honest or reflective discussions. You may find that a situation that could have been handled better leaves you all mad and upset instead of feeling closer to a resolution between the both of you.

If your children are happy and the relationship was strong before the incident, it’s a good thing to look at how you can work together on moving forward before throwing the baby out with the bath water – so to speak.

This is by no means the golden rule book for nanny relationship management – but perhaps, a different perspective. But, I do hope that my experience has provided me a depth of knowledge that you’d benefit from.  And I sincerely hope you do.

An article on hiring a nanny from a parent’s perspective: http://meetasitter.posterous.com/top-5-steps-to-best-prepare-for-hiring-a-nann. 

For further information about Meet A Sitter and how we can help you find a babysitter or nanny through our boutique service, visit: http://www.meetasitter.com.au 

Guest writer - Sharon Cullington is a professional nanny and a life coach. She has a blog for Nicer Nannies and Intuitive Childcare, raised three great children and facilitates women’s workshops through her business, SCOPE Coaching. Please visit www.sharoncullington.com.au to find out more.

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Who You Need and How To Find Them 

Carer Profile Segment #3 - Nannies

This is the third part in a series offering a quick cheat-sheet to carer profiles of who’s best to help you for the specific kind of care you need. This month, we share about Full-time and Part-time nannies. They are a more challenging fit to achieve due to the level of commitment required of them, the responsibility placed on their shoulders and the financial negotiations that come with hiring someone who depends on the job for their livelihood.

Find out more about the kind of candidates you should be looking for to fulfil the roles below.

• Nanny - A nanny is someone who has sole-charge care of your child(ren) and is normally seeking at least 30-60 hours a week. Part-time nannies may work between 20-30 hours a week. Essentially, they have full responsibility for your child(ren) in the home and would have more extensive experience than other kinds of carers given the responsibility. Most are open to household chores but some may want to focus mainly on the childcare aspect. The nanny would have gained that experience over the years, others may be qualified nannies or childcare workers. This person should be someone who is knowledgeable, proactive, consultative and be able to gain your children’s respect as well as love.
  
• Live-in Nanny - This nanny would live with the family in their home with free room and board, in return for a reduced hourly rate. It would particularly suit families who have a need for someone on a full-time basis but want to keep to a tighter budget. In many cases, it would work best with a nanny early on in their career or an international working holiday visitor in the country for a period of time as they would want to have the security of a home yet be open and flexible enough to live in your home and be “on-call” most of the day. Giving them the respect of their own space and hours is important to make things work. But most of all, a live-in wants to be a part of the family in every sense - and be treated as such vs. just another pair of helping hands.
  
• Mummy Nanny - This is a mother who also wishes to nanny for your child(ren) either in your own home or theirs. The main difference from a regular nanny is that the Mummy Nanny would have her own child to care for at the same time. This would suit families who have 1-2 children in the same age range as the nanny’s child. This would enable the benefit of being able to have instant playmates for your own child. If you have an infant under the age of 6 months, you should be very comfortable with the Mummy Nanny’s ability to care for both children at the same time as the child’s needs are greater at the young stage. But for toddlers - having a playmate is often a wonderful experience for them and this might suit an only child very well. The person should ideally be very well-organised, calm, structured and have a very good sense of how to manage their own child as they take on an additional child with his/her own personality and needs.
  
• Nanny Share - This is where two families share a nanny - thereby cutting the cost of nannying for each household by between 20-30%. There would normally be a location rotation between households but the nanny should still have sole-charge care of the children with all the normal responsibilities of a regular nanny. Having someone with experience, knowledge, proactiveness, respect for the children and very good communication with both parents is again key to make it work. You’d want someone both families would be comfortable with and have a good rapport with. The challenge of being able to meet both parents’ preferences of routines, activities and other factors is important - so having a calm, flexible and adaptable nanny is very important. If you're keen on coming to an event to find a nanny-share option, it's best to come along with the other sharing parent so both of you can make an assessment together.

 Hopefully this has given you some food for thought on hiring a nanny - whatever shape or form your needs come as. 

For more tips on the negotiation process - read our article on Top 5 Steps for Hiring a Nanny on our blog!
 

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Who You Need and How to Find The Right Person

Carer Profiles Part #2 in A Series: Before & Afterschool Carers

This is the second part in a series offering a quick cheat-sheet to carer profiles of who’s best to help you for the specific kind of care you need. 

This month, it's all about Before and Afterschool carers - what I call the "holy grail" of a candidate if you can find them. This isn't just for families with primary-school aged children. Even families which babies and toddlers at daycare places who close by 3-4pm fall into this category.

Why is it hard to find someone? You're ideally looking for someone who can commit to 1-3 hours on either side of the day for the long term. In reality, most people who have full day availability will be looking for proper nannying jobs so a few hours a day may be something they won't commit to for long - the last thing you need! Further, some parents might also need someone who has their own car - which if you're inflexible, knocks out a large proportion of candidates who may be able to commit to the time.

Find out more about the kind of candidates you should be looking for to fulfil the roles below.

• Beforeschool Carer - Someone to come in early in the morning to assist with getting the children ready for school or daycare whilst you jet off to work. The person should be ready to be there as early as 7am and finish by around 9-930am after the drop off to school. For this care, you should find someone reliable, energetic (especially in the mornings), organised and structured so the morning routine can be kept to schedule. 

• Afterschool Carer - Again, someone to help mainly working parents manage their busy schedules with the school or daycare pick up in the afternoons and evenings, actvities run, afternoon tea preparation at home, homework supervision where relevant, playtime, maybe dinner, bath and bedtime routines. The shift normally goes from 3-6 or 7pm during the week, so you’ll again need someone reliable, organised, able to balance fun with supervision of homework. Getting someone with past teaching or tutoring experience would work well especially if homework supervision is important. Otherwise, there are a myriad of carers out there who have different skills and knowledge - from crafts and music to teaching swimming or sport - that can be used to keep your child(ren) entertained and active after school.

For either type of carer, the best options would either be a student with a schedule that fits those hours or a mature candidate who would love to work with children in their retirement but only for shorter stints during the day. For these candidates, the hours and commitment fit their needs comfortably. Not to say those who have more open schedules wouldn't want to do these hours - you just need to ensure that they are ready to commit to your family, even if they get more hours offered to them by another family.

Another factor to consider would be requirement of their own vehicle. If it's absolutely mandatory, make sure they have a clean driving record. If you're able to let them use your car, you may need to add them onto your insurance. It may cost more, but you may have more options that way as most candidates have a drivers licence. Otherwise, consider being open to the carer accompanying the children on public transport or walking if at all feasible. It may also end up as an adventure for the children and it opens up your field of candidates.  

Finally, if your requirement is for a 4-5 days a week, be open to considering a couple of candidates to fulfil the role as that kind of specific availability may not exist in a single person for the long-term. It might be a great opportunity to expose your children to different carers who can teach them different things. Children are more adaptable than we think - often enjoying consistency but also some variety in that consistency. It also affords you a backup option in case one carer falls ill or goes away on holiday, the other one may be able to pick up the day and offer the same kind of familiarity you want for your child.

These are just general guidelines on what you should look out for when hiring someone to help your family in this type of role. By honing down your criteria and making smart selections, you'll get a better chance of finding someone for the long-haul.

For the next part in the series, we'll be talking about the A-Z of nannies. Stay tuned for this next month!

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Who You Need and How to Find The Right Person

Carer Profiles Part #1 in A Series: Mother's Helpers, Casual & Regular Babysitters

Too true - possibly an ode to all the wonderful babysitters and nannies who help us make life work and keep the children loved. Thank you to all the wonderful carers out there who help us make it work. Love - Working mothers everywhere.

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By Rachel Emma Silverman (Wall Street Journal Blog)

Happy (almost) Mother’s Day! Two very funny women have been in the news lately for their take on working motherhood:

–Comedian Amy Poehler, at the Time 100dinner for influential people, gave a shout-outto those often unheralded people who make many of our lives possible: child-care workers:

I have thought very hard and long about what has influenced me over the past couple of years, and since I have been at this dinner in 2008, I have given birth to two boys and I’ve left Saturday Night Live and I started my own TV show, and it’s been a crazy couple of years, and I thought who besides Madam Secretary Clinton and Lorne Michaels have influenced me? And it was the women who helped me take care of my children. It is Jackie Johnson from Trinidad and it is Dawa Chodon from Tibet, who come to my house and help me raise my children. And for you working women who are out there tonight who get to do what you get to do because there are wonderful people who help you at home, I would like to take a moment to thank those people, some of whom are watching their children right now, while you’re at this event. Those are people who love your children as much as you do, and who inspire them and influence them and on behalf of every sister and mother and person who stands in your kitchen and helps you love your child, I say thank you and I celebrate you tonight. [Hat Tip: New York Magazine]

–Meanwhile, here’s the “prayer for a daughter” written by fellow Saturday Night Live alum Tina Fey, in her hilarious new book “Bossypants.” The line that resonated the most with me:

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels.

What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

Poehler and Fey have hit upon some universal truths of working parenthood:  If possible, get — and profusely thank — help for your family.  (Few working parents can wing it alone.) And most of us struggle with finding the right mix of career fulfillment vs. time with family; it’s hard to find that “perfect” career path that will allow us to have both at the same time.

Readers, how influential are child-care workers in your family’s lives? How have you thanked them?  And for pre-Mother’s Day fun, what would be in your prayer for your children?  What are your Mother’s Day plans — or on your wish list?

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CAN YOU REALLY DO IT ALL?

How many of us ask this of ourselves daily? Juggling the children, partner (if there is one), work, home, friends - oops, did I forget YOU? We seem to have the inbuilt gene in us to have to try to do it all, and do it well, but we’re likely killing ourselves doing it and doing it all poorly as a result?
I’ve been reading some great tips from a fantastic group of women in an Executive mothers group on Linkedin, and thought I’d try to digest the best tips for all of us to benefit from.

WHAT’S YOUR PHILOSOPHY? 

1.  Family always comes first. It has to. No one other than family would put up with us when we’re busy and tired and crabby – so time with them should be prioritised. But putting them first doesn’t mean that you put yourself last. There has to be a way to keep everyone’s needs in sight, and for me that’s about giving others permission to be equally involved in both the decision making and implementation of family priorities.  

2.  Partner. (Not everyone has this benefit, I realise.) My husband is my rock, and yes I’m sure we don’t acknowledge our partners as often as we should. Says one mother - “But practice makes perfect – my first marriage was a complete and utter failure so I’m glad this one’s better! I’m glad that we have a practical relationship, that we understand the cycle that one is up when the other is down, and that we give each other the space we need to be ourselves and the support we need to achieve our goals. But it doesn’t always just happen: it’s a constant and ongoing focus to keep things on track.” Another single parent gives some sage advice, “For those ladies that are fortunate enough to have partners, never, ever criticise the job your partner has done on the cleaning, ironing, whatever. Even if it's not as good as the job you would have done be grateful that you have somone who wants to help.”

3.  Career. Most often, it’s the women who beat themselves up far too much about giving enough to their careers. We experience not only guilt for being away from our children, but guilt for not putting enough into the job. My experience is that there’s a lot more “give” in our careers than we believe is possible. Comments one mother, “I’ve seen first hand in my 16 year corporate career that men face just as many career challenges as women. In many cases, they just don’t have the outlet to express it. I admit that I’m not currently an employee, and that it’s a different dynamic being a supplier, but all of us have the power to take control of our careers and make them work for us.”

4.  Home. Sure, all of us want a pristine and neat home to live in. Having the place clean before going before bed just makes me feel like something is in my control! But I have come to a point in my life when I know sometimes, something has to give and out of everything - this would be it. Somedays, I leave the dishes piled in the sink for tomorrow because, frankly I’m too tired and I’d much rather be reading to my son at bedtime than sweeping the floors! Another mum agreed with me, “I’m afraid I’m never going to be a domestic goddess, there are too many other things that are more important to me. But clean is important to me – and almost enough for me. So I get a cleaner through the house once a week (and yes, she moves the objects around enough to vacuum and clean under them!) and if it gets a bit messy in between… oh well, it happens.”

5.  Self. The past 3 years, I’ve focused less on myself than at any other time in my life because my son blessed us with his presence. I feel so privileged to have him in our lives - but dang if I don’t look down at my toes and feel a pedicure in great need! I’ve begun to realise that time for myself means that I can be a better mother, wife, friend and business owner. So learn to say no and mean it. If I don’t take care of myself, how can I be anything to anyone else?

PRACTICAL TIPS - REALLY!

So enough about philosophy - let’s get down to the nitty gritty. How do you make it work everyday at home? Some fantastic tips from other mothers living it everyday.

1.  During the next school holidays or long weekend, organise the family working bee - get the kids involved in throwing out the old and really cleaning up the home. Once you've cleared space and removed clutter it's a lot easier to maintain with a few simple daily tasks. 

2.  Do as much as you can the night before you go to work to prepare for the next day. Get your clothes/accessories selection out for the next day (get the kids to do the same) and make your lunches. This only takes about 20 minutes out of your after dinner downtime, but will save an amazing amount of time in the morning rush! 

3.  On Sunday afternoons (especially in the Autumn/Winter) make a couple of large casseroles or freezable meals that can be portioned. If you do this just twice per month, it can be an absolute godsend at the end of a very busy workday. 

4.  It takes a village. Kids can do chores! Many of us forget that our parents used to get help from us (especially if you had two working parents). Teach your kids how to use the washing machine and how to hang out clothes. They can also use a vacuum cleaner in their rooms, too! Get the kids to water the plants, set and clear the table, feed and water the dog/cat. These are simple jobs for younger children. Remember, by teaching them these skills you are actually preparing them for life and making them aware that everyone contributes in some way to their community - and that's what a household is, a community. 

5.  Don't iron! Hang clothes out on the clothes line (giving them a good shake to rid them of wrinkles) and when dry, either neatly fold or hang them straight up. The only ironing you may have to do is hubby's shirts - my drycleaner has a special deal - 5 shirts for $13 if you want to give up ironing entirely! 

6.  Fix appointments and stick to them - put a line down your diary, put all your fixed appointments on one side (i.e. Dentist at 9am, Review Meeting 3pm) and then list your other priorites on the other side. Complete in the order of priority in and around those fixed appointments.

7.  Get help - Whether it’s a babysitter who can take the kids for a couple of hours a day, or a cleaner to help with the house once a fortnight - decide what help you need and if you can afford it, make it happen. You’d be amazed at just how much 2 hours of down time can feel in the course of a crazy week.

When it feels like it’s all getting to be too much, you’re probably juggling so many things you can’t possibly be doing a good job of any of them. At times like these, the best thing to do – at least temporarily – might be to do nothing at all until the dust has settled and you can think clearly about what really matters and what to focus on next.
 
This Mother’s Day, remember to appreciate you - and forget about doing it all.

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Top 5 Steps To Best Prepare For Hiring A Nanny 

There must be something in the wind this fall - we've had three parents come to us in the last week in a scramble seeking a nanny as theirs had pulled out on them at the very last minute. Along with some of the most annoying and disruptive experiences to go through in life - losing a "dead-set" nanny a few days before they start is right up there with them.

(NB: It goes the other way too with parents pulling out on nannies - it's important that we realise it's never just one party's wrongdoing.)

To be completely honest - there is no sure-fire way to prevent this from happening. People make decisions for themselves every day and some of them will just not work in your favour, period. BUT, there are certain steps you can take to best prepare for the process of finding and keeping your nanny.

Step 1: Start Looking At The Right Time

Most of us want to prepare ahead of time to know that we have a great nanny in place way before we commence the role. That said, there is a period of time that can be too far away for a candidate to "hang out" without a wage. The best timeframe would be between the 2-4 week range. This is close enough to the start date that the nanny won't mind waiting out a few weeks. You might consider offering them a few trial days over the "waiting" period so they get oriented to your family routine and the children, whilst earning some money in the meantime. Trying to sign on someone further away from that one month period and you could risk losing that person to someone willing to hire them tomorrow. 

Step 2: Consider The Hours Offered

The bottomline is - more hours often means greater assurance. If you only have a couple of half days to offer a week, you might be better off finding a student who can fulfil those part-time hours vs. a professional nanny seeking to fill their week. If the nanny has those slots open - I'm sure they'd take it. However, if they have an open schedule - they will go for someone who can offer full days vs. part days. The risk you have would be that they might get another offer further down the track for full days and be very tempted to take that as it's their livelihood. The reality is that if nannying is their full-time income - they have to eat and find work that best fits their needs.  An option you might have if you could afford it, would be to lengthen the offer of hours you can offer - even if you may not necessarily need it. This is if you're in dire straights and really need someone to commit.

Step 3: No Surprises Here! Get The Requirements Hashed Out Upfront

Really have a think about what's important to you that the nanny might do in their daily or weekly routine - household chores, party organisation, playdate management, errands, helping with house admin, cooking, cleaning, school pick-ups, sick days, pet care etc. Even if you think it might only come up ever so often - mention it and make sure the nanny is clear of what's expected of them. There is no point glamourising a role if it's not real. Dealing with kids and a busy household is tough - so be very honest about what help you need so there aren't any surprises that might cause the nanny to reconsider the job. If you note any hesitation at all when you discuss this - make sure you probe and get an honest truth from them about it. Sometimes they may say "yes" when feeling the pressure of an interview - but really mean "I'm not really sure I want to do that." 

Step 4: Cold, Hard, Cash

It may not sit pretty with everyone, but talking about the nitty gritty of money is so important. You may find that they state an initial rate upon talking to you early on, but once they understand more fully what's involved - be prepared for an uptick in rates. We may not always understand their rationale for "pricing" their service - but you need to be prepared to work through it with them. Nothing's worse than talking about everything else beforehand, only to come to the week before they start and speak about rates. Out of everthing - the rates will often cause negotiations to fail. Sometimes, it's because the parties don't handle it amicably - other times, it's just because the figures don't match up. But you want to have talked this through - as unemotionally as possible - once you get through Step 3 and really land on a final agreement. Put it down on paper or email to make sure all parties are clear and in agreement. It's a business transaction - so make sure you treat it that way - otherwise, you might lose your new business partner.

Step 5: Back Up, Back Up, Back Up!

This is why I set up the "speed-dating" group model of Meet A Sitter. I firmly believe that you need options - 3-4 people you have in your little black book to call upon when you need them. When it's a nanny you're hiring - you obviously want one person (in most cases) - but you should always seek 2-3 more people to have on your list of emergency back ups. The best options would be to of course to have a 2nd choice nanny with the same availability (in case the first one goes pear shaped during negotiations or the onboarding period), and another couple of casual sitters who have some of the days you require a nanny for. Remember, nannies get sick, take holidays, have emergencies themselves. So, you should always have a few people you establish a relationship with and have on speed-dial as I can nearly guarantee, you'll need them at some point. 

This is a very basic and general cribsheet on what I've learnt through my own, and many client and nanny experiences. When you're taking such a huge decision for your family (and often professional career) - you want to make sure you handle it thinking about all possible scenarios. I'm happy to see so many families united with many wonderful nannies - and I'm hoping that you'll be one of the partnerships that work! So, happy hiring! 

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Channel Ten News Covers Meet A Sitter - How Speed Sitting is Solving Busy Parents’ Childcare Needs

Channel Ten News approached us to cover us in a story about how the "Speed-dating" or "Speed Sitting" service we started in Australia was changing the face of the search for childcare. It was a real pleasure working with them and we're so glad that we were able to share the story with Australians - hopefully it will give you a quick sense of how we're striving to help busy and time-poor parents find great babysitters and nannies for their children in a time-effective and convenient way.

View the whole segment online here:  http://www.youtube.com/user/Meetasitter?feature=mhum#p/a/f/0/CBiRhbJXaFc 

Find out about attending an event near you to meet your next sitter or nanny. http://www.meetasitter.com.au.

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6 Ways to Save For Rising School Costs

The latest reports on the cost of sending our kids to school has truly sent a shiver up my spine - as it would any parent wishing the best for their child’s education. The fact that you could buy a unit (government school) or a house (private school) is mind-boggling - and a contraceptive in itself!

The most expensive school fees’ have risen by over 100 percent in the last decade - against an inflation rate of only 37 percent.

According to the Australian Scholarship Group, the total cost of putting a child through a government primary and secondary school is estimated to be around $110,000 (includes tuition fees and levies (including fundraising contributions), uniforms, school bags, music and sport materials, computer costs as well as incidentals like private tuition and extra curricular activities.) For private school - you could expect between $440,000 to $500,000 per child.

According to debt collecting agency reports, families are really struggling to pay these increasing fees. There has been an apparent 25% increase in bankruptcy hearings related to unpaid school fees - with private schools in particular increasingly prepared to pursue debts outstanding.

You could question the choice of whether private school is worth it, but even sending our children through government schools can bear a big enough cost on families given the cost of all the incidentals, excursion fees, gadgetry etc.

Here’s the first in a two-part article on how we could start addressing the need to save for our childrens’ education.

This article will focus on finding the best deals around and budgeting. The next article in the series will address savings plan options as part of a long-term investment programme.

1.   Plan to bid for it or swap - Identify big-ticket items where you’ll gain the biggest benefit from shopping around. Do you need to have something new or are there second hand resources you can purchase these items from - for example, on www.eBay.com.au or www.quicksales.com.au. You can also find great deals on Computer/IT equipment, mobile phones, kids furniture etc. on www.Graysonline.com which is a bidding site for lastminute overstock, demo models and new items. You could also do a swap with friends on things like textbooks, computers and software.

2.   Recycle childrens’ stationery - Look at what can be cleaned up and reused vs. automatically throwing the old stock away. Often you get good long-term use to some of the items for another whole year if you make the effort.

3.   Shop as you go - If you’re a sale hound like me, I always tend to stock up when I see a really good bargain. So keep your eye out for deals whenever you go grocery shopping throughout the year - it means you could save between 10-50% on items when you buy them out of cycle instead of peak school season.

4.   Buy at discount chain stores - By going here instead of schools’ book lists can save between $50 and $500 on a typical primary school student’s school book bill.

5.   Stash funds you won’t miss - A simple way to have what you need for extra costs that aren’t as obvious - for example musical instruments, extra tuition, excursions or replacing lost items - is to stash away money you don’t account for in your monthly budget. This could be pay rises, bonuses or tax returns. 

6.   Do away with gifts - Over the holiday season, children get showered with toys - often many more than they will ever be able to play with or even want. You could encourage close family members to give education donations for Christmas instead. By putting away even $25 into a plan today could pay for a good chunk of school expenses in just 10 years’ time.

7.   Education Tax Refund - Three words that could mean up to $794 in returns for secondary school children and $397 for primary school kids. Visit www.australia.gov.au/educationtaxrefund to find out the list of claimable items you should keep receipts for today. 

Bring thrifty is the now back in vogue. The reality has set in and post-GFC and the recent run in interest rate rises, everyone should rediscover the joys of saving and finding value for money. We simply cannot afford to do otherwise. Finding ways to put a budgeting and savings process in place - separate from our day-to-day family budget - will put us in better stead for costs coming up. Why? Because isn’t our childrens’ education is the last thing we’ll want to cut back on? I think so. 

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Stumped For Valentine's Day? Here Are A Few Easy Options To Consider

Valentine's Day is a "funny" special day to celebrate - it's recognised as an important day but isn't acknowledged by a holiday. So that means all of us need to "work it in" during our busy weeks. So if you're like me, you're looking for easy ways to spend meaningful time together.

Here are a few interesting things to consider:

1. An overnight stay at a local hotel - Get an overnight babysitter from the evening til the next morning or afternoon to grab a luxury stay somewhere closeby and remember what it was like to laze in bed with your partner. Lastminute.com.auhave "Secret Hotels" as an option to book something last minute for a mystery hotel (4-5 star) for a fraction of their regular price. Puts a little adventure into it too!
2. Spa For Two - Really need to unwind and only have a few hours? Most day spas have couples treatments where you can both enjoy "laying like broccoli" whilst being pampered by therapists, listening to whales in the background. Endota Spa and ThaSpaare two that we've tried ourselves - to die for!  
3. Intimate Meal & Fireworks - Want to end your evening with a "bang"? Enjoy a meal somewhere in Darling Harbour and tell your date you've whipped up something something special with the Harbour just for them. Fireworks go off at 9pm - something that will light up their face...whether or not you really set it up. ;) View more information and deals from restaurants and services at Darling Harbour.
4. Make Something Together - There's a whole world of gourmet classes out there to tickle any taste-and-creative bud. Check out the gourmet chocolate making classes. If you're in for something with a little more kick - cocktail making might up up your alley! Adrenalin offers vouchers for both!
5. Fly By The Seat Of Your Pants? - If you'd prefer to be surprised, you could try signing up for free alerts toLivingSocial's daily deals with 50% off most services and gift vouchers for everything from hotels to cupcakes and theatre tickets. 

6. Get Dressed Up For A Night In - Too tired to even think about going out? Keep it special by really making the effort to both dress up, have a candlelit dinner at home once the kids are in bed and watch a romantic movie. Check out some great picks for Valentine's movies (don't worry - they aren't all chick flicks!)

    

   Whatever you end up doing, it's just about you and your partner - the rest is just icing on the cake. Enjoy!

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Why January’s The Hottest Month To Find A Nanny or Sitter

That's right - out of all the months in the year, January is the hottest month for finding yourself a new babysitter or nanny.

Here's why:

1. University students - young or mature - are on break right now and seeking work for the new 3 months before university starts. Even if you're looking for longer-term help, you'll find them in these candidates as they are often still available post March for a few days a week once their schedule is set. Getting to them early on during this period means you could secure great talent before they get hired by someone else after March. 
2. Professional nannies often face diminishing hours from families whose children are going to start school or daycare. In this circumstance, many end up looking for new families to either fill their hours or start afresh completely. 
3. Working Holiday candidates - a large number of working holiday candidates - often with a year to spend in Australia and qualified childcare/teaching professionals. Most arrive at the end of the year and are really looking to start with a family as soon as possible.

Many of these candidates get snapped up really quickly at the beginning of the year and end up staying with their families for a while after that. The beginning of the year is always the best time to find new talent and...if you like them...hang on to them. That is definitely not to say that you don’t find great talent throughout the year, there’s talent all year round to be found. However, January comes up with a “bumper crop” and that’s what you want as a parent - an abundance of choice!

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Holiday Rates for Sitters & Nannies - What to Expect
It's that time of year where you're facing parties galore, holiday trips and the iminent New Year's Eve/Day festivities.

If you're looking for help, it's useful to know the premium rate that often comes with the holiday season. So, to help you prep yourselves, here's a quick cribsheet on what to expect:

• Christmas/New Year's Eve Night Sitting - You should be ready to pay an additional $5/hour on average for these special dates. I know it may seem alot, but it's only once a year and why not ring it in with a bang?!
• Overnight Sitting - Just because you managed to come home the night before, doesn't mean you want to be awake by 6am the next morning. If you're looking for help the morning after and some fun for the kids, why not get your sitter to stay overnight. Normally, you can expect to pay them their normal hourly rate for time spent caring for your kids and just add circa $40-60 for the overnight period. 
• Holiday Travel Nanny - If you're planning a trip away and would love nothing more than to bring your regular/new nanny along to help out, a holiday nanny can be a real comfort to you and alot of fun for the kids. The nanny is technically on duty 24/7 whilst away with your family - so, paying her hourly rate for "care" time with the kids plus all her basic travel, accommodation and meal expenses is fair.  If you can plan the days of when she's on duty and agree on a flat rate - that would be the best way to go about it.  The general standard would be the hourly rate for "care" time and the overnight top up as well. If the kids are going to be taken care of by you during the night and in the early mornings - you could negotiate a lower rate for the overnight section if that was agreeable with the nanny.

Final tip - get planning early, especially for New Year's Eve! We're getting all our available candidates to let us know of whether they're available so if you need help, you know how to call...and it's not the Ghostbusters! ;)

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